Men are called whores if they sell their soul for money. Men are called Man Whores if they pursue women for transactional, disposable, sex. The word whore is clearly not restricted to women, even if you want to claim it was created for women.

You did not answer my question. How long would a woman remain your close girlfriend if she insisted on you picking up the tab every time you did something? This is the litmus test for me about whether we are having an honest conversation about the subject. …


And why women should not let them

Credit card
Credit card
Image Source: Markus Winkler on Unsplash

From a man’s perspective, we are always paying for sex. It is just a matter of how and when. That so many women refuse to change that dynamic, says something about how many women are comfortable with that social contract; with that arrangement.

I wrote recently about the date where the lady offered to pay half, and when I agreed to let her, she froze, shocked that she might actually have to pay half, and then started talking about how a man who would let a woman pay, is not the kind of…


A woman who cannot provide for herself is a much scarier creature. She will spend millions of dollars of your money while the children a growing up, and then, one day, take half your money without contributing to your joint wealth at the same level as a successful woman. Plus she will be insecure about her role in the family and the world and drive you crazy with that as well. LTR with a woman who can provide for herself is a much more balanced relationship, and better for everyone concerned.


There is some basic truth to this article. Nice job. However, I will say, it may be possible to have a great life without a primary romantic relationship. And for those on the dating scene, we know all too well, that if you are not actually living with your romantic partner, it is "easy" for either person to just walk away, as many often do. So that puts a ceiling on the "suck" part.


What do men hear, and what should they hear

“I Believe in old-fashioned chivalry”

There is a term that I am hearing more often to describe a male “player”, a man who has many sexual partners. The term is something like “man whore”. While I personally find the term “whore”, directed at either a man or a woman, harsh to the ear, it is probably about time to have a term for men who behave in this way.

If a man acts like a whore, then perhaps he deserves to be called a whore. If a woman acts like a whore…

One line I have…


I've been on dates with over two dozen different woman since being separated. I find that whether the conversation turns to my history, and a revisiting of my reflections, depends quite a bit on who I am talking to.

I find if we are both laughing, having fun, and just enjoying learning about each other, it does not go there. But when we really have nothing to talk about, and there is no authentic fun going on, or if someone just points the conversation in the wrong direction, it just goes there. …


Any man should apply this same filtering criteria to a woman, including the very first criteria.


25 dates: date #1

The number 25
The number 25
Image Source: Waldemar Brandt on Unsplash

Series Introduction

Approaching two years of physical separation, and my 25th first date hence, it seems I have learned lessons from each of these dates. The universe has given them to me as a present, to learn about life and/or myself. Therefore, I am going to write a series of short stories about each of these dates, what they have meant for me, and perhaps some thoughts for others embarking on similar post separation journeys.

25 Dates: Part 1

We sat down for the first time. I noticed the lines in the neck of the mid 50's woman. Disappointment bubbled inside. I…


Groundhogs Day For Online Daters

Image: Denny Müller on Unsplash

Last night was another first date. The lady in question has a job where Tuesday and Wednesday are her Saturday and Sunday, so it was a Tuesday night date.

  • I am tall, she is tall. Check.
  • She has a job. Check.
  • She is good enough looking. Check.

This could go be ok. I’ve been here before though.

I live in a remote area, so my dates are usually 20–70 miles away from me. This is often a barrier to sustaining the relationship.

I don’t have much tolerance for drama, and the ladies I date are…


Results flow from choices

Adults realize that if they jump off a ten-story building, there will be consequences. By the time you become an adult, you have had enough scrapes with gravity that you just accept it is an inviolate force in your world. For some reason, we are a little more stubborn when it comes to forces in relationships, which are also inviolate.

Woman facing a man and smiling
Woman facing a man and smiling
Image Source: Giorgio Trovato on Unsplash

For me the big one is money and ambition. If a woman I am dating asks me if I am ambitious or how long I have been at my current company, that sends warning flags into…

Third Act

Awakening, discovering who I am, reinventing myself. Childhood, marriage, and now post-separation/divorce. It is my third act. My best act so far.

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